God, it’s kind of like that boss you have at work- the one you hate because he has more power, makes more money, and is dumb as a rock. Nice going slick…

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson

Samantha Ronson is Jewish, but girlfriend/gal pal Lindsay Lohan was raised Catholic. So what does a love-struck lesbian do when her religion doesn’t jive with her lover’s and a big wedding ceremony approaches? She converts!

According to Lindsay’s Facebook profile, the sexy new celesbian is converting to a new religion. Now that is commitment Lindsay! Good for you!

Shelley Malil, Haziz from the 40 Year Old Virgin

Fact is, that 43 year old actor, Shelley Malil (best known for his role as Haziz in Steve Carrell’s 40 Year Old Virgin) has been arrested. Monday night he was detained by the San Diego Sheriff’s Department in connection with the brutal stabbing of his ex-girlfriend.

The police were called by a neighbor of the victim, who heard screams coming from the apartment. Rumor is that after the attack Shelley went on his way to his lawyer’s office to get legal council on turning himself in for the crime.

The ex-girlfriend is still in critical condition and Shelley is in custody on $2 million bail. You Hollywood crazies…

Kymberly Clem in the Offensive Dress

Ok maybe whoever dubbed her the “Dumbest Girl in America” was being dramatic, but they do have a point- take some English classes lady! What’s really funny is this “dumb” girl will most likely be better off than most of us pretty soon.

Kymberly Clem claims that she was walking through the Richmond Mall on Saturday when a security guard approached and made her do a ’360′. He then told her that the dress was too short, she was attracting attention from married men, and she had to leave the mall. As if?!

She’s apparently taking legal action against the security guard and the mall for discrimination and harassment and a load of other nasty things. Hey, more power to you honey.

Honestly, in spite of her grammar and speech issues, I completely side with this chick. That security guard is obviously a chauvinist pig!.. and this girl is obviously a feminist…. of sorts….

This is NOT news worthy, but.. uhm, here’s the video for a good laugh anyways:

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=6f8_1218525637

My Best Friend's Girl - Movie Promo Poster

Dane Cook is hilarious! Apparently the actor/comedian HATES the poster for his upcoming movie, ‘My Best Friend’s Girl’ and he isn’t ashamed to tell us alllll about it. Read this directly from his official blog:

Dear Diary

Before the downpour let me just say that my new movie, “My Best Friends Girl,” is the best / funniest film I’ve done yet. It’s got a terrific cast. Kate Hudson, Alec Baldwin, Jason Biggs, and myself really kicked the funny around. This movie showcases our talents accordingly as it expands on them. It’s a fun R-rated flick. An edgy comedy with a dash of romance.

That being said, let me address the fact that although I’m not a marketing major, I have a bit of a trusted reputation after 18 years self promoting. I’d like to inform you I had no say in this marketing campaign, but if I did, things would be different since it is obvious that this poster is boring / odd and has zero to do with the movie I performed in.

Here are a few things that truly blow about my upcoming movie poster to promote the release of the film opening on September 19th:

1. Graphics:
Whoever photoshopped our poster must have done so at taser point with
3 minutes to fulfill their hostage takers deranged obligations. They should have called Donnie Hoyle and had him give a tutorial using “You Suck at Photoshop” templates. This is so glossy it makes Entertainment Weekly look wooden.

2. My head:
The left side of my face seems to be melting off of my skull. I guess I am looking directly into the Ark of the Covenant? Are they going for the bells palsy thing here? My left side looks like Brittany Spears’ vagina.

3. The Stare.
My character apparently has fallen in love with a strand of Kate Hudsons hair. Kate’s mannequin is desperately in love with the inside of my right ear while Jason is half stunned, half corsage.

4. Lips:
It looks like I’m wearing Maybelline Water Shine Diamonds Liquid Lipstick. My characters name is now Winter Solstice and I’m a hooker with a heart of gold. Jason is my floral carrying pimp, while Kate is my first trick!

5. Fashion:
My character is sporting a very high collar I mean damn they should be snow capped at that altitude. It’s going for the vampire lurking in the castle basement vibe. An Olympic pole vaulter would have a tough go clearing that collar. I’m also able to turn my head comfortably 180 degrees, because I was raised in an abandoned barn by a family of owls.

6. Flesh:
It’s no secret that I’m more rugged facially due to a drunken visit by the teen acne fairy, but according to this poster I’ve got perfect porcelain flesh. I look like the fuckin’ bathroom floor at Caesars Palace. One of Marie Osmond’s dolls would look at me and say “shit … that guys got flawless skin!”

7. Hair:
It’s actually a close up shot of Tom Sellecks Magnum P.I. mustache they photo-slapped on my noggin’.

8. The set:
Pick one. This entire film takes place:

A. on Gattaca
B. at the Fortress of Solitude
C. inside a crystal wind chime

9. The cast:
Alec Baldwin is so fucking funny in this movie! Is he on the poster? I think so. He plays the wise talking plant Jason is clutching.

10. Final thoughts:
I set out to make a movie like the contemporary men and women, that you and I respect, are making. My generation of comedians, actors, directors and producers that I wish to collaborate with as I build a solid body of work.

Granted, one poster stinking up the joint isn’t the end of the world. Yet it sends the wrong message about our movie and I just wanted you to know, that I feel the pain. I really love the film and I know from past missteps marketing wise that the wrong poster sends the wrong audience into the theater.

Thanks again for all of your support. If you have not seen the red band trailer (which is excellent and represents the flick accordingly) click on the link at the top of this page.

PS – “Its funny what love can make you do.” I just threw up all over this awful poster.
Wow, wait … it looks better.

In what may prove to be the least watched reality show finale on broadcast TV, Mark Lambrecht, a 42-year-old high school teacher from Wisconsin, won ABC’s “The Mole” Monday night and Craig Slike, 30, a laid back graphic designer from San Diego was identified as the Mole.

Mark’s grand prize was $420,000.. lucky!

Craig - The Mole!

The third person in the finale, Nicole Williams, an Omarosa-like OB-Gyn doctor from Chicago, was simply elminated.

The fifth season of the show, which had returned for the first time in four years, never caught on with viewers and had fallen from 4 million to about 3 million viewers in its first eight episode. The finale was expected to do particularly poorly against the juggernaut of the Olympics.

Four Day Work Weeks in the News (not ads):
Most State Workers in Utah Shifting to a 4-Day Week
4 Day Work Week Gets an A+ at College
Chrysler Pushes Four Day Work Week
Toledo Jeep May Go to a 4 Day Work Week
Four Day Work Week Considered

You know, it’s funny, but for decades workers have been pushing for shorter work weeks. The Flint sit-down strike of 1937 demanded 8 key items, one of them being a 30 hour work week. Workers were (and continue to be) exhausted, less productive, and depressed by the amount of time they spend “making money” each week. But it has been the practice of employers to generally ignore the mental and physical health of employees, to a degree of course. Someone out there always NEEDS the job they have, and employers know that needy workers will work day and night to make enough money to survive.

That’s why shorter hours have never been a top priority for employers. Employers make more money over-working employees than they do giving them the proper rest time, the proper balance between work and personal life.

But now what’s happening is QUITE interesting! With this looming energy crisis taking hold of people’s wallets, employers are looking for ways to save money. Switching to a 4 day work week might be just the thing, as powering an office for 4 days is less costly than doing it for 5 (or 6 or 7). That saves the employer money. It also somewhat saves the employees their sanity- though I’m sure the work day will be extended to make up for the lost time. The 4 day work week will also save commuters time and money and allow for more family time… and rest.

At my “real job” I actually have 4 day weeks in the summers and I must say, in the summer I am much more relaxed and motivated. As it gets colder, I tend to get more distracted.. and grumpy! I thought I had seasonal depression, but maybe I get that way because I’m over-worked? All I know is last Friday was my last Friday off and I’m not happy about it at all!

PS- In France the MAXIMUM work week is 35-hours! Some companies require less than 25 hours of work per week to be considered full time! And on average, employers give 8 weeks of vacation! EIGHT!

MTV's The American Mall promo ad.. Are these supposed to be high school students???

Actually, when I first heard that MTV was making a movie about teens hanging out in a mall, it piqued my interest… after all, I did grow up in New Jersey (Mall Rats will forever a dear place in my heart). However, I soon learned that it was one of those campy musicals that they keep coming up with… As someone who has never quite understood the millennial obsession with Disney’s ‘High School Musical’ and after watching the pitiful plot line of Camp Rock last week, I must say I’m not exactly dying to see MTV’s new sing-and-dance movie, ‘The American Mall.’

The American Mall stars Nina Dobrev (of Degrassi: The Next Generation), Yassmin Alers, Rob Meyes, Neil Haskell, and Autumn Reeser (of The O.C.). Basically, the entire movie can be summed up as a conglomerate of High School Musical and Camp Rock, all chewed up and spit out into a mall setting. I’ll probably watch it tonight out of shear boredom. Review to follow… Scratch that.. couldn’t bring myself to do it…